It can be really hard to forgive people who hurt us. The plain fact is, however, that it can take 2 to cause the hurt every time. There is you, with all of your feelings and perceptions about life and the way you should be treated. And there is the other person, who has certain habits, ways of speaking, and own thoughts, feelings and perceptions.
In many case, hurt caused is not intentional, but accidental. Things come out the wrong way. We hear them a certain way. A person is tired, hungry, angry about something else, and takes it out on us.
You might feel as though you have a lot to forgive, but the truth is, WE make mistakes as well. We are not perfect, and will hurt other people’s feelings from time to time. In this case, we would hope to be forgiven. If a person values the relationship, they will forgive.
Sometimes the event is so terrible, however, that it can seem impossible to forgive. But forgiveness does not automatically mean that everything is okay and you let that person back into your life. It can also mean letting go of the past and the pain, and the person, in order to move on to a better place in your life.
To forgive is a choice as well as a feeling. It may seem weak, but it is really liberating and empowering to choose how you want to feel, the way you want to live your life, and who you want in your life.
If you have been struggling to forgive someone, evaluate the issue and the relationship. Is it a deal breaker? If not, then forgive. If it is, tell the person you forgive them, and mean it. Then move on. Surround yourself with positive people in tune with what you need and you should find you have a lot less to forgive each day.
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