Dealing with Shame
Dealing with shame can be difficult, but it is essential if you want to become your best self and live your best life.
There are a number of sources of shame, some external, others internal. You may not be able to control what happens in your life, but you CAN control how you choose to respond to each situation as it arises.
You might feel shame because you are being made fun of. You might also feel ashamed because you are told to. How many family members have ever said to you, “You should be ashamed of yourself!” Rightly, or wrongly, this can trigger feelings of shame that can be difficult to overcome.
Then there are situations where you are the victim, but somehow feel it is your fault, such as bullying or assault, in particular sexual assault.
You will also usually feel shame if you have done something to hurt someone else, even if it was not intentional. It can damage the relationship unless you do something to make amends. It can also cause you to beat up on yourself for making a mistake, which prevents you from learning lessons from the past and moving on.
In this course, we will discuss the different types of shame and how to deal with them rather than dwell on them and become prisoner to feelings of shame.
REGISTER FOR THIS COURSE NOW:
To start studying this course, click on the button on the right, BUY NOW, to pay for the course. You will be asked to create a user name and password for this site. Once you have set up your free account, you can buy any course on the site. Pay via PayPal or any credit card.
Once you have paid, return to this course page. Instead of the BUY NOW button, you will see a “Start the Course” button instead. Click on it to start studying now.
Note: You may have to REFRESH the page for the button to update.
Navigate though the course through hitting the buttons at the bottom of each lesson to move forward, or use the clickable table of contents that will appear once you start the course to move up and down to the different sections if you wish.
If you have any questions, please contact us.
This course came about as a result of the #MeToo and #WhyIDidntReport movements. They have done a great deal to expose the issue of sexual assault in society, and how despite being the victims, women are often treated as if they are the ones who should be ashamed rather than their attackers.
We started to compare notes in the office and within our families. Almost every one of us had at least one story to tell. The sad reality is that 1 in 3 women will be sexually assaulted or raped in her lifetime. The current attitudes of many in society is to ask what they were wearing, doing, and so on at the time of the alleged attack, making it seem as if she invited the assault in some way. This ‘slut shaming’ has led to few reports, and even fewer convictions. One study shows that only 1 in 1,000 rapists will ever go to jail because of the fear of reporting and the ordeal if they do, plus the current legal system which rarely gives custodial sentences, and mostly just a slap on the wrist.
In the US, if a person breaks into your home and steals a TV, their usual sentence is about 8 years. Women are far more valuable than TVs.
Then we have the sense of shame that we have done something harmful to another person. Women tend to be “people-pleasers” and are often prone to feelings of guilt and shame regarding “letting others down.”
However, dwelling on these feelings can lower self-esteem and self-confidence, and lead to a negative perception of oneself that can be difficult to overcome.
We may not be able to control everything that happens to us, or everything we do, and the often unforeseen consequences of our actions. What we CAN do is control our response to internal and external events. Rather than wallow in shame, we can use each event as it unfolds as a teaching moment which can bring about helpful, lasting change.
So, let’s meet our instructor, grab our course downloads, and get started.
Eiver Stevens is an author and life coach. She has written more than 50 guides and course designed to help people live their best lives.
