4 Reasons Why We Find It Hard to Accept Things as They Are
When we set out to improve our lives, so much of what we need to learn is grounded in acceptance.
- We set out to accept who we are as individuals.
- We try to accept the people around us without changing them.
- We need to accept some things cannot be fixed.
- We accept sometimes we need to let something go and try something new.
For some reason though, we tend to fight acceptance, even when we know it’s good for us in the long run. Why is it so hard?
We are Afraid
Most of our fear is grounded in the feeling that we will somehow lose control by giving in to something. If we accept our child is not going to college this year, we fear they won’t ever go. We fear that if we accept who we are now, we won’t ever change. Typically, these fears have no basis in reality. This is because fear has a way of getting under your skin. Think of these acronyms:
- False
- Evidence
- Appearing
- Real
- Future
- Events
- Already
- Ruined
To combat this fear, you need to ask yourself some hard questions. What is the root of this fear? Is it reasonable?
We Lack Faith
We don’t want to accept where we are or where we’re going because we really don’t know if everything is going to be okay. Here’s where you are required to trust you have the skills needed to get where you want to be. Accept you’re capable of taking this path, using history as your guide. Have you done this before, perhaps? If not, has someone else? If the answer is yes, then how can you apply those lessons?
We Expect Too Much from Others
Sometimes our acceptance is blocked by the worry that when we accept those around us, they’ll let us down somehow. In this case, you need to examine whether you’re asking too much, or even if it’s your own needs you’re asking them to fulfill, not theirs.
We Lack Humility
Acceptance comes especially hard for those who think their way is always right. It’s hard to accept the ideas or input of those around you when you’re caught up in this kind of black and white thinking. By recognizing you don’t know everything, and that other people have valid contributions to make, you’ll find it easier to accept what someone else is doing might also be right.
Accepting things the way they are is absolutely crucial to your mental health. It’s exhausting to constantly fight to be in control of everything, and it’s wildly impractical. Learn to let go. Accept the world around you, and you will finally find true happiness.
